Effective Listening

Do human beings, most of times, really listen effectively? How often do we try to shut up our mouth and open our ears in order to make a conversation effective? Or have we ever put ourselves in trouble to find out how much important is listening than talking?

We are, by nature, blessed with certain qualities that one, way or the other, shape the way we are and the way we live, speaking and listening are two of those qualities. As a matter of fact, the development of our talking faculty is directly dependent on ability of listening. Research in the field of psycholinguistics has evidenced that if a child is deprived of listening for a known period of time, he will, highly likely, fail to develop certain organs that are responsible for speech production. The child will not be able to talk as normal children do when he grows up.

The fact that effective listening is more important than talking holds a considerable importance in our lives. No meaningful conversation can take place until the participants are listening to each other attentively. Any good communication requires a balanced approach towards listening and talking. Oftentimes, people while conversing show excessive inclination towards talking and make great efforts to get maximum chance and time to speak. This however, results in minimum understanding of the matter that is being discussed. They hurry in producing counter arguments and completely disregard to listen responsively what has been said and how to respond accurately. As a famous American educator and author Stephen Covey in his book ‘7 Habits of highly effective people’ says that “Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” Such behaviors consequence in the failure of carrying an effective communication as well as all the important information go in vain owing to poor understanding of the matter, caused by inappropriate consideration of the listening part. There, a deluge of mistrust comes into existence. On the other hand people who talk more and listen less get themselves in trouble as they anomalously lack knowledge of facts and figures or make false accusations. There for one should always spend most of his time and energy in developing the habit of listening so he could become a good listener. It shapes all other skills that we possess.

Man has two ears and one mouth which symbolizes the significance listening through natural instincts. Sometimes it is difficult to prioritize listening over talking but once one gets himself accustomed to this practice, it will surely strengthens the roots of patience and courage his mind. Man is, by no means, forced not to talk but giving a good amount of attention to listening in all circumstances can result in many benefits. It helps us extend the boundaries of our knowledge and broaden our thinking power. An ample amount if listening assets us in gaining good communication skills and avoid complexities and confusion. Moreover effective listening can save us from facing any regret that is caused by limited listening and excessive talking.

Thus man should try to confine his talking spheres and empower his listening areas as the world needs people who listen more and talk less. To get the pleasures of interactions and communication, one has to be an effective listener. Wise is not the one who keeps on beating about the bush rather the one who listens silently to what others say as a famous columnists Doug Larson once said that “Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you’d have preferred to talk.”

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Ehsan Kakar Written by:

Secular and Humanist. Love reading.

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